My Way…


I am not a star. There is no halo around my head. Fate does not like the color of my eyes.

Struggle and strife are good friends of mine.

Who am I?

I am survival. I am guts. I am pride. I like odds. Especially when they are stacked against me.

Because there will come a time when I will stare them in the eye…

…and smile the smile of someone who has pulled it off.

I will be the guy who will have deep lines on  his face someday. And it will make me look good when I laugh.

Because that is the day when I will fear no fear. And, taste the sweat that is sweet. Interesting? Click here to read more...

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Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head…

Affection is complicated and illogical… the sense that it’s possible for two humans to bond just because they like the same song.

I remember once when this number was played…. I sat-up almost simultaneously, and then realized that in that room there was another, who had exhibited the same kind of reaction as I.

I remember when our gaze met… we had a mutual appreciation and feeling that there is someone just like me…wonderful isn’t it?

I remember the bus rides on the lonely island with just a walkman and a CD with this number among, others like Nights in White Satin. We had day passes, we had the sun playing hide-and-seek with the tropical rain clouds, we had the ocean in a rainy mood, we had the music, and we had each other. Hmm, Raindrops keep falling on my head… Interesting? Click here to read more...

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Some old emails, some forgotten notes.

I have been looking at my old emails, and I see the date stamp on them. I visualize how it was during that time. Life was good, it was competitive. There is an old saying that Time that passes is always a good time, it’s when time ceases to move that humans suffer.

I heard this a long time ago and always discarded it as some old forgotten statement made by some deranged mind. However, now I realize what it means. How deep it’s meaning is….come to think of it one might be going through the most difficult times of all and one keeps believing that this will not be forgotten but as life moves on all those rough edges are blunted and rounded and all one can remember are those bitter-sweet(more of sweet and less of bitter) memories. Interesting? Click here to read more...

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Perpetual Prozac

Sometimes pain can take you to the edge of numbness which is good feeling by itself…. you know the pain is there but you don’t feel it…like being on perpetual Prozac.

Life is strange..well who doesn’t know that? But at times I just don’t know why things happen the way they happen. Coincidence……maybe?? But personally I don’t believe in this. It’s the Law of karma.

I guess a sharp memory is good …as long as one is in high school!!! After that it’s a bane.

Has anyone had this strange feeling that when you stand a certain place and you can see all the past activities that you have been involved in at that particular place happen again around you. As if you are silent spectator of this 3D movie in which you are the central character. I had that feeling today when I stood out on the terrace tonight, I saw (or I think I saw) all those past events happen again. Interesting? Click here to read more...

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Java Threads & Voyager Spacecrafts

Sometimes you know things happen, people move on, get separated, but life has its chords running. Just like threads in a java program, some of those threads don’t die or can’t be terminated. They just keep running continuously in the background, doing what they were originally intended to do. The program may be terminated but the threads keep running taking resources and a lot of memory space.

It’s so amazing to think about it all and the only feeling one gets is of awe and wonder. Things get antiquated and obsolete. But like the voyager, which moved out of our solar system, it just keeps sending pictures of what it sees and what it has passed. And we for generations will have to deal with the magnitude of the information that our own threads running out there will provide us someday. Interesting? Click here to read more...

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